How to Measure the Quality of Your "Parental Relationship"

Quality of “parental relationship” :
اپنے بچوں سے  تعلق قائم کریں قبل اس کے کہ کوئی اور ان سے تعلق قائم کرنا شروع کر دے ۔
Following parameters indicate quality of your relationship is NOT good and you need to be concerned if:
  1. If you don’t trust your child, then there is a “trust deficit”. Action required: Develop trust relationship. Read Covey’s “Speed of Trust” 
  2. If your child does not have confidence, then you must first develop in the child “self confidence”. Confidence comes from the ability of child to make mistakes and ability to rectify them.  The child gets support from parental guidance when parents are patient and allow the child to overcome what they lack.  The child should not be afraid of approaching the parents. Children are afraid to approach the parents when they feel that parents are overly judgmental. 
  3. If you don’t spend enough quality time with your child, then there is an “attention deficit”. The child may be yearning for attention and revert to any one who would offer attention. Parents must understand what is quality time. Quality time is that where you are daily/regularly involved in a mutually pleasurable experience with your child. This can include a joint viewing of a documentary or a decent movie, or  joint cooking of a dish, or joint gardening, or joint reading, or  joint discussion on some interesting topic (other than gheebat or acrimony or school), playing computer game with your child or playing team sports,….. You need to discover where you and the child click.
  4. Does your child consider you as a confidante? Is the child comfortable in sharing (with at least one parent) his/her issues,  good and bad personal experiences, happennings, trivia, friends matters,  activities…

These are major indicators of the quality of your “parental relationship” with your child.


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